


Drive Me Crazy

by LiteralGuitarHero



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: And Loves Akaashi So Much Like What, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bokuto Is Ultimate Senpai, Friends to Lovers, How Do I Tag, I have no idea what I'm doing, I'm Sorry, I'm a fraud, I'm so sorry, Light Jealousy, M/M, Oblivious Kageyama, Pining Hinata Shouyou, There's not smut in the second chapter, Tsukishima is a marvelous bastard change my mind, author is trying her best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:55:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25042024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiteralGuitarHero/pseuds/LiteralGuitarHero
Summary: Everything means more than it did a few days ago. He likes Kageyama. With his stupid soft hair, and his ugly moue, and his amazingly super-fast sets. Every action suddenly makes so much more sense.or the one where Hinata realizes he's a gay disaster and sets out to win over his setter.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Hinata Shouyou & Kozume Kenma, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou (mentioned)
Comments: 26
Kudos: 221





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I lowkey wrote this on a whim. If it's shitty, PLEASE tell me! Do not let me keep this up if it's bad. I really like writing, but I'm also super self-conscious about it.

They’re in practice when it hits him. Quite literally.

The way he studies Kageyama’s back through his jersey sometimes. The extra glances he sends him to make sure he’s watching when Hinata is about to do something impressive. Nevermind that those situations only work out in his favor less than half the time. Kageyama will look too late, or he’ll flub whatever he’s trying to do and get the iron claw for his troubles. But that doesn’t matter because now he _knows_ . The shifting on his bike seat to turn and wave to Kageyama when they part, whether he sees or not; the shivers when Kageyama grips his hair. Everything means more than it did a few days ago. He _likes_ Kageyama. With his stupid soft hair, and his ugly moue, and his amazingly super-fast sets. Every action suddenly makes so much more sense.

“-nata. Dumbass, watch out!” He barely registers a voice before a spike is nailing him in the face, rocking him off his feet and onto his back. His head thuds against the wood and the air is knocked from his lungs. He blinks back tears and a small whine squeezes out of his throat as he tries to suck air back in.

“Fucking idiot,” he can hear someone muttering under their breath and then he has a faceful of Sugawara who helps him to his feet and dusts him off. 

“Are you alright, Hinata?” Concerned brown eyes peer into his own.

“Fine, Suga-san,” he nods, “just got lost in my head for a second.” 

“Right.” And Hinata can tell that Sugawara even is exasperated; he feels a twinge of guilt. “Well, please be more careful next time.”

“Will do!” He runs off to practice his receives.

-

“Oi, dumbass,” Kageyama says to him later as they’re walking home. The air is almost _too hot_ and the setter’s face is sheened with sweat and Hinata’s briefly struck with the need to wipe it away for him before Kageyama brings his shirt up and does it himself. Hinata’s eyes stray to his abdomen, the sparse hair trailing into the band of his boxers that peek out of his jeans. He cuts his eyes away, focusing instead on his face. “What was so important that you didn’t even _try_ to receive the ball?”

“I was just... thinking about stuff.” 

“Well, don’t. It’s not really your strong suit,” Hinata grumbles and Kageyama ignores him, continuing on. “There’s training camp next week. You need to be sharp if we’re gonna stand a chance at actually winning against some of those teams.”

“I can’t wait to see Kenma! It’s been so long since we played Nekoma.” Hinata beams and Kageyama scoffs. “What? You always do that.”

“ _You_ always bring up Kozume every time we talk about leaving Myagi to play.” He rolls his eyes.

“Well, he’s my friend. It makes me happy when I see him. Just because you’re a loner and you like to play by yourself,” he drops his voice toward the end, pushing his hair to his forehead in what he deems a _very_ good impression of Kageyama who knocks his hands away and grabs at his head. “Ow, Kageyama, you’re squeezing my brain you jerk!”

“Then stop doing stupid shit! I don’t sound like that,” Kageyama grits out.

“ _I don’t sound like tha- ow!”_

“Quit it, you moron!”

_

Hinata’s quaking in his seat, unable to sleep the entire ride to camp. Kageyama hits him over the head several times when he gets too loud, talking to himself and waking up their teammates.

“Why are you like this? Everyone’s trying to sleep, dumbass.”

“’m excited, I can’t help it.” Hinata squirms. He gets this frustrated look on his face like even _he’s_ irritated that he can’t calm down and Kageyama huffs a sigh. It’s pointless to egg Hinata on when he’s like this, he won’t be able to tell him anything without him getting more worked up and both of them getting yelled at by their upperclassmen.

“Look, if you shut up, and try to sleep, I’ll toss to you later.”

“But you toss to me anyway.”

“...I’ll toss to you as much as you want. Just stop being so annoying.”

Hinata pulls down his lower eyelid and sticks his tongue out at him, and Kageyama is filled with the overwhelming urge to hit him. But then Hinata nods and settles back into his seat, leg bouncing, and Kageyama relaxes next to him. 

When Hinata falls asleep not even fifteen minutes later, snuggling into Kageyama’s bicep, drooling and rearranging himself every time the younger tries to pull away. Kageyama sighs and takes a moment to look at him. When he sleeps, Hinata is much more delicate than he usually is, softer somehow. He breathes through his mouth in little puffs, nose scrunching up when the bus goes over the occasional bump and Kageyama can’t quite figure out why it is that he wants to beat the shit out of him when he’s not even doing anything wrong.

_He’s like…_ cute _or something._ His brow furrows and he tries to shake Hinata off once more before he resigns himself, sitting back and closing his eyes.

_

Hinata is flushed hours later, anxiously awaiting personal training. The last time they went to camp, Kageyama had been pissed off at him and he’d hardly gotten to hit any of his tosses at all. He’s excited to spend all of his extra time doing it, if Kageyama will agree to.

Tsukishima had taken every opportunity to bring up his falling asleep on the ride and Hinata’s face had been in a ever-deepening shade of crimson all day. 

“Shut your mouth, Tsukishitma.” Kageyama had responded, and Hinata stifled a laugh.

“Defending your girlfriend, King?” Tsukishima asked tauntingly, and Hinata, before the conversation could get awkward, got up and moved to sit with Kenma over at Nekoma’s table, Suga reprimanding the taller middle blocker as Hinata walked away.

_Stupid Tsukishima._

Hinata doesn’t think he’s ready to acknowledge that he maybe _wants_ his counterpart to be right about that scenario. He wants to keep the idea of he and Kageyama to himself a little while longer.

_

Hinata can’t keep the idea of he and Kageyama to himself anymore.

Not when Kageyama is so _hot_. And not when he gets that determined look on his face that Hinata knows means a really good toss is coming. Certainly not when he’s standing next to him, during practices, and the dark-haired boy smells like sweat and soap, because he doesn’t know that he’s ever wanted anyone like this before.

He resolves to ask a friend. Someone smart, and suavé, someone good at listening, who’ll give him good advice.

_

“Bokuto-senpai-” Hinata breaks off, sounding unsure, takes a deep breath. Bokuto thinks he should say something comforting right about now. _What would Akaashi tell him?_

“W-what do you think of gay people?”

Bokuto inhales sharply, eyes widening. This certainly isn’t what he’d expected when Hinata had dragged him out to sit after dinner. Hinata turns away, red-faced, already looking like he regrets asking. A pregnant silence unfolds over the pair. Bokuto breaks it with low laughter and Hinata fidgets uncomfortably.

“Chibi-chan, are you trying to tell me something?” He smiles, but by Hinata’s answering uneasiness, he isn’t quite as reassuring as he’d hoped.

“No, I just- I don’t-” He closes his eyes, sighing through his nose and Bokuto feels bad for trying to joke about it because the kid almost looks _ashamed._

_Fix this, fix this, fix this. What would Akaashi say?_

“It’s okay if you’re into guys, Hinata.” His kouhai looks up, letting out a breath. “That’s why you asked me, right? Would I still be your friend?” Bokuto keeps his voice light, and Hinata nods, seemingly relieved that he doesn’t have to explain further, the beginnings of a smile appearing. “Chibi-chan, it’s no big deal. A lot of dudes like other dudes. Look at me and Akaashi,” Hinata’s mouth falls open a little and his eyes are shining. “Is that why you were so worked up?”

“It’s- more like- h-how would I ask someone out?” He ducks his head self-consciously.

“Ah,” Bokuto’s chest puffs. “Declarations of looove. Pretty badass, Shorty.” He leans over to rough up his hair.

The underclassmen shakes his head quickly, shuddering, “I think he might hit me if I ever tried to declare anything.”

“What? Why? When you get a confession, and they look at you with nothing but admiration, like they’re trusting you to love them back, there’s nothing like that.” He recalls the first one he’d gotten. Hitomi had been so sweet, pink cheeks, and shaky hands, and a younger Bokuto had felt a sense of brimming pride that a girl had thought he was important enough to make him sweets, even if he _hadn’t_ accepted them.

“Wow! That’s so cool! I bet you get lots of confessions, Bokuto-senpai!” Hinata’s eyes gleam keenly, before he’s subdued. “Did you confess to Akaashi-san? That’s not really Ka- I mean- that’s not really his style, though. He’s kind of awkward and grumpy, and he’d probably kick me if I ever tried to confess like that.” 

He sighs, and Bokuto bites back a grin. “Your setter, huh?” 

Hinata shrugs a shoulder sheepishly, and Bokuto barks out a laugh. He’s never known his disciple to shy from anything, let alone his emotions. This must be a big deal. 

_The advice you give here is crucial, Koutarou. What would Akaashi say? Probably something boring that makes sense._

_Akaashi!_

“I’ll be right back!” He pushes himself to his feet and sprints off toward the Fukurodani dorms.

_

Bokuto returns a few minutes later, his setter lagging behind him. 

“Akaashi-senpai? What are you doing out here?” Hinata looks between his upperclassmen. 

“Hello, Hinata-kun. I’ve been asking the same thing.”

“Akaashi,” Bokuto huffs, indignantly. “I take you off on an _adventure-_ ”

“You _drag_ me out of my bedroll, as I tell you I’m going to _sleep_ -”

“Well, Chibi-chan needs help, and I thought you’d-” a hand pushes him out of the way.

“Are you hurt, Hinata-kun?” Akaashi is suddenly moving forward to inspect him and Hinata feels himself hold in a laugh as Bokuto grumbles about never being fussed over. 

“I’m fine, Akaashi-san. I asked Bokuto-senpai for advice and he left to go get you.”

“I see,” he raises an eyebrow. “And what happened to being the ultimate senpai, Bokuto-san?”

“ _I still_ _am!_ I just thought maybe it would be helpful to have more than one person helping him out,” he crosses his arms, pouting.

Akaashi gives him an unimpressed look and turns to Hinata. “What do you need help with?”

“Well, I- there’s this- my-” he fumbles and for some reason he can’t quite get the words out. 

Akaashi seems to be in no rush, but Hinata can tell he’s tired and grits his teeth. This isn’t any easier the second time.

“Hinata has a crush!” Bokuto blurts, “and he doesn’t know how to ask him out!” Hinata’s mouth falls open, and he feels his face twist before turning to the second-year determined and nodding.

Akaashi must notice his discomfort because he brings a hand up to whack Bokuto, who winces, upside the head.

“That was wrong, Bokuto-san. You don’t just out someone like that. You should-”

“He’s right, Akaashi-san. I am. I do.”

“And that’s perfectly fine, Hinata-kun. But it wasn’t his secret to share, and so he should apologize for sharing it.” He casts a steely glance to Bokuto, who shrivels from it, guiltily.

“ _Keiji_ ,” he whimpers, and Akaashi is immovable. “I’m sorry Hinata. That wasn’t okay for me to do.” And his senpai sounds so dejected and sincere that _Hinata_ feels bad.

“I forgive you! I probably couldn’t have told Akaashi-san on my own anyway!” And when his grin doesn’t falter, Akaashi continues.

“So, you need help to ask this person out?” 

“Yeah… We’re, like, different,” Hinata explains. “But the same! And he doesn’t really like touchy-feely stuff so I could never just tell him without him hitting me or yelling at me or something, that jerk.”

Akaashi pauses to think on this. “So you like Kageyama-kun?” 

And Hinata’s shifts once more, nodding shyly, face heating up.

“But you can’t tell him?” The idea of Kageyama looking at him like he’s disgusting and maybe even not being his friend anymore looms over him and Hinata’s head whips back and forth.

“Maybe you could show him instead of telling him,” Bokuto says. 

“How would I do that?’ Hinata cocks his head to the side, and Akaashi almost looks impressed. 

“You couldn’t have figured that part out before you decided I couldn’t go to sleep?”

Bokuto fixates him with a glare and resumes, “Maybe talking to him more, giving him gifts, touching him more” Hinata makes a face. “Or not touching him more. Finding out more about what he likes. Do you know what he likes, Chibi-chan?”

“Well, volleyball, obviously,” his forehead creases in concentration, “and milk.”

Bokuto nodded encouragingly, “what else?” 

“He likes yogurt…” 

Akaashi sighs a bit. “You’ll have to think a bit bigger than dairy products, Hinata-kun.”

“But that’s all he cares about,” he frowns. Tanaka-nii was right. Kageyama _is_ kind of simple.

“Well, what do _you_ like about him? What makes him so special?” 

“Well,” Hinata ponders for a moment, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck. “He’s a great volleyball player, obviously.”

“Very important.” Bokuto affirms.

“Like, I’ve never seen anyone play like him. He always works really hard and you can just _tell_ he cares a lot about playing and it makes me feel like- like _plshah!_ You know?”

“ _Plshah!_ ” Bokuto nods and Akaashi looks perplexed before his eyes shift to Bokuto and then he shrugs.

“And he’s tall, and his hair looks really smooth and soft, and he’s just got these eyes, Bokuto-senpai- like they’re so nice and it’s like, I just see the color everywhere now-”

“Gunmetal blue,” Bokuto breaks in, his own glazed over with an infatuated look. He turns to Akaashi, who pointedly looks away. “There’s just something about them.”

“ _Yes!_ And the way he tosses the ball, he can do it from basically anywhere, and when I spike a really good one, he gives me this look like he’s almost _proud,_ and I feel like I could hit a million more.”

“That’s beautiful!” Bokuto’s eyes are shining, and Akaashi pats his arm gently.

“Hinata-kun, you should probably go get some rest, and we’ll meet tomorrow to work out a plan.”

“Yeah! You gotta be well-rested to get your boyfriend!” Bokuto laughs.

“Yes sir!” Hinata bows before scurrying off to the Karasuno dorms.

_

Hinata wakes up early. And _hard._

Judging by the heat in his pants, he’s been this way for a while.

Closing his eyes, he tries to will his erection away. He thinks of tests, of the stupid frog from Natsu’s cartoon, of volleyball. 

_Kageyama is_ so _good at volleyball. Kageyama. Ugh._

He holds his breath, aching in his briefs and canting his hips into the arm between his legs. He lets his eyes drift to Kageyama’s face, poking out from beneath his blanket, breathing slow and steady. His hair falls back off of his forehead, giving Hinata the opportunity to look at his whole face. His eye twitches beneath a lid. He mumbles something and sighs a bit, shifting.

_So, so cute._

He gets more aroused at the sight of Kageyama, all sleepy and soft. He worms his hand into his boxers and wraps it around himself, pulling at it languidly, pleasure stinging the hardening flesh as he feels the familiar tingling sensation pooling in his belly already. He closes his eyes and he can see it-

_Him, mounting Kageyama, climbing into his bedroll, into his lap, fumbling his way into Kageyama’s underwear to lick his hand, smear the fluid gathered at the tip, and rub their cocks together._

_“Fuck, Hinata-” he’d probably choke out, gripping his asscheeks tight to drag him against his length better, cock nestled in the apex of his thigh, and it would take everything in Hinata to not hump him harder, fucking his load into Kageyama’s hipbone._

He brings his hand to cover his mouth as he nearly _sobs_. Everything is so warm, his hand is so tight, and he ignores the straining in his wrist as he moves his hand faster, faster. 

Kageyama, Kageyama, _Kageyama. Oh, please make me cum. Make me cum, fuck!_ He whimpers quietly.

He trembles, sighing aloud as he paints the inside of his pants. His vision goes fuzzy and his mouth falls open, toes curling as his orgasm shatters him. 

He pants, sweat cooling on his forehead and in the middle of his back as his eyes regain focus. 

Kageyama shifts and sighs once more, brow furrowing as he curls up in Hinata’s direction. 

The reality of having just jerked it to his best friend cracks over his head and makes him squirm abashedly at himself. The cooling cum pressing on his limp dick makes him feel even more dirty as he wipes his hand on the inside of his pants and pushes his blanket back to grab a fresh change as he gets to his feet to go to the bathroom to clean himself.

_That was so wrong_ , he thinks to himself. _I shouldn’t have done that._

When he comes back, most of the team is shuffling around trying to get dressed and Kageyama is sitting up, looking blearily at Hinata’s empty bedroll. Hinata’s face heats up and he shoves his soiled drawers into the pocket of his shorts as the shame of what he’s done overcomes him once more.

He’s tucking his bedroll up when Kageyama speaks.

“You were talking in your sleep,” he tells him and Hinata grimaces. His eyes won’t let him look at Kageyama anymore.

“I do that sometimes.” He turns away to pull off his shirt and get dressed. 

_

Hinata sits with Fukurodani and Nekoma during mealtimes. He can’t bring himself to be near Kageyama for too long without feeling the guilt bubble in him but no one in Karasuno says anything to him about it, so he starts staying with the other teams during breaks too.

He sits cross-legged, head on Kenma’s shoulder, talking to Akaashi near the doors of the gym. 

“Shouyou, you’re so sweaty,” Kenma mutters, eyes on his PSP, and Hinata sits up. 

“Sorry, Kenma.”

“No one said move,” he huffs, and the younger puts his head back. Kenma’s lips twist up briefly.

“Hinata,” Akaashi keeps his voice low. “How do you want to go about approaching Kageyama-kun? I really think it would be best to start by just talking and getting to know him as well as you can.”

“He’s kind of already my best friend- oh! Besides you, Kenma!” The second-year ‘tch’s and Hinata is immediately reminded of Tsukishima.

“You could give him gifts. Kuro showed me by giving me things.” Kenma says.

“That’s because you hate talking and getting to know people, and you and Kuroo-san are childhood friends.” Akaashi amends.

“Mind your business, Akaashi.”

_

Kageyama is not having the best day. Hinata had left him to sit with Tsukishima and Yamaguchi alone at breakfast, and he’d stayed gone besides their brief strategizing during breaks, and Kageyama, hisself, just feels _off._ Like something isn’t right.

His suspicions are confirmed when he happens upon Hinata and Kozume in the hallway on his way to dinner. 

“He’s just so _hot_ , Kenma.” Kageyama isn’t sure what they’re talking about but he gets the feeling he’s not supposed to hear such things. He tucks himself behind a corner as they continue to walk. “And strong and he doesn’t even realize how cool he is.” He pokes his head out as Hinata whines, and Kozume sighs. 

_Who is he talking about?_ Kageyama thinks about the people he knows. There’s no shortage of strong and attractive people at camp, he supposes. 

“And his _eyes_ ! He’s got these big blue eyes, and they just drive me crazy! I just feel so- so- _fwah_ when I look at him y’know?”

“Shouyou, why don’t you just tell him all of this?”

“I can’t! If I did, it might ruin everything. Then he’d never toss to me again.” Hinata looks down. “I didn’t realize for so long and now that I have, I just want to tell him everything, but not if it makes him stop being my friend.” Kozume rubs his shoulder and pulls open the canteen door.

_Who is he talking about?_ Kageyama frowns to himself. _Blue eyes? Tosses? Akaashi-san? Hinata likes Akaashi-san?_ Kageyama feels a chill prickle at his back, and frowns. _Hinata doesn’t. He can’t. He’d tell me if he had a crush on someone, right?_ He shrugs off the weird heavy feeling that blooms in his chest at the thought of Akaashi tossing to Hinata and continues onto dinner.

_

**Phase 1 - Ask Him Questions**

Hinata is a man on a mission. Inspired and confident after his conversations with his senpai, he’s memorized the list (internally dubbed _Hinata’s 4-Step Plan to Win Over One Kageyama Tobio,_ but that’s just semantics) of questions, conversation starters, and ideas that he and Akaashi-san came up with together. The real challenge will be getting answers without receiving a fist to the top of his head. He’s not too hopeful about the last part.

“Hey, Kageyama! Do you like short girls or tall girls?”

“I don’t like girls.” Kageyama tilts his head and Hinata feels hope bubble inside him. “I like volleyball.”

The feeling fizzles out like a firework.

“It’s no use, shorty. King has a one-track mind.” Tsukishima snorts.

Hinata pouts but thinks better of being teased by the other middle blocker and schools his expression. He cries out when Kageyama’s hand clenches, pissed off, in his hair.

“Dumbass!”

“I didn’t even do anything! Tsukishima did!”

_

“Kageyama, what kind of milk should I get?” 

“What?” he looks up from his lunch. A piece of rice is sticking to his corner of his mouth and Hinata digs his nails into his palms to keep himself from impulsively reaching to wipe it away from the soft looking skin. He sobers when Kageyama flicks his forehead, whining, more out of habit than because it hurts.

“I- Well, you’ve tried all the milk here right? What kind is best?” 

“Oh. I mean- the banana milk is really good, but the strawberry is pretty good too,” his brow furrows and he gets this really pissed off look on his face, eyes not quite focused on Hinata. “Of course, you can’t go wrong with just plain milk. Maybe I should look at what’s in the machine before I tell you,” he’s more thinking aloud than really talking to him as he gets up from the bench to go check out the milk machine, and Hinata stifles a laugh into the palm of his hand. Hinata gets called cute often, the main reason being his looking like a child, but everyone is utterly _wrong_. Kageyama is totally adorable. He’s just really sneaky about it.

“Oi! Dumbass, are you getting milk or not?” 

_

Hinata learns as much as he can about Kageyama in the following weeks. About his sister, Miwa, and the fish tank he used to have with nothing but animal crackers in it when he was little because they were his pets, and how he likes the machine that’s near the gyms the best in the mornings because the milk is always coldest and despite all of this information being seemingly redundant, Hinata grows fonder and more and more attached to Kageyama, even if a lot of his quirks have to do with gripping the top of Hinata’s head. 

He’s learning about Kageyama’s middle school experience as they’re on the way home one day. He doesn’t know much about Kageyama before Karasuno besides the whole “King of the Court” thing because Kageyama doesn’t often bring anything up about his life before Karasuno, so Hinata finds himself growing very distraught over the way middle-school Kageyama was treated as they walk through sunset-lit streets. 

“They _bullied_ you,” Hinata says sadly. “That’s not okay.”

“No. He just didn’t like me. Which is fine. Not every senpai likes their kouhai.”

“Kageyama, I’m like, ninety-percent sure he tried to hit you like, halfway through this story. That sounds like bullying,” Hinata’s shaking his head as he wheels his bike and Kageyama shrugs. “I just thought it was normal.”

“Kageyama, _noooo,_ ” Hinata wails. “This is the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. Let’s talk about something else.”

“Are you nervous about the practice match?” Kageyama rolls his eyes but switches topics easily. “You’d better not panic and throw up on Tanaka again.”

“It was _one_ time,” he protested.

“One time too many. You were like a hose,” he mutters, half snorting to himself and the shorter boy briefly feels like he’s going to catch a nosebleed.

_Gwaa! So cute!_

Hinata bites back a grin even though the comment was at his expense.

_

**Phase 2 - Make Conversation**

Kageyama is surprisingly good at doing this all on his own, as long as Hinata doesn’t say anything dumb first to ruin it.

“What do you think of that middle-blocker from Dateko?” he keeps his gaze forward as they’re stretching after practice.

“Which one?” 

“The one without eyebrows.”

“Oh! Aone-san. He’s really nice when you get to know him. We talk sometimes.” 

Kageyama gets a look on his face like he’s smelled something kind of gross and then scoffs. “Do you talk to all of the other teams?” 

“A lot of their players are really nice and we talk about volleyball. I talk to Bokuto-senpai a lot too, why?” 

Kageyama stands abruptly before shrugging. 

“No reason.”

_

They’re at the park with Natsu when Hinata tries again.

He and Kageyama are bumping a ball back and forth while his sister builds herself and her dolls a home in the play structure. 

“Kageyama? Do you talk to other teams?” Hinata asks, cutting a quick glance to make sure Natsu hasn’t wandered off. 

“No. I mean, I’ve emailed Akaashi-san before, I guess. Like for advice.” He gets a genuinely pissed look on his face for a moment before his face smooths back out.

“But like- not to be friends or anything?” 

“No.” Kageyama shakes his head and Hinata frowns. “I just don’t really get the whole making friends thing. I just want to play volleyball, I don’t care who it’s with.”

“Volleyball is more fun if you’re friends with who you’re playing.” Hinata says and Kageyama shrugs. 

“I never really had friends to play with before.”

“Kageyama! I’m your friend!” Hinata insists. _More than, if you ever want me to be._

“Well, yeah.” He doesn’t say anything else but Hinata feels himself blush a little bit and blames it on the cold nipping his face.

“Nii-chan!” Natsu runs over. “Come look at my house!” She takes his hand and is pulling him. She stops to grab Kageyama’s too. “You too, Tobio-chan. You can be the dad, and nii-chan will be the baby.”

“Wait- why am I the baby, Natsu?” Hinata stumbles, and Kageyama smirks into the fist that isn’t clasped with Natsu’s.

“Because, I’m the mommy and I said.” Kageyama immediately stops smiling and looks pleadingly to Shouyou, who laughs out loud.

_

Kageyama’s waiting for him after practice. Hinata ducks back around the corner of the club room building. It isn’t uncommon for them to race to see who can get changed faster and walk home together, but if Hinata’s running behind, Kageyama will just go home. He’s never waited for him before. He feels himself nearly choke up in excitement and wills it away. He doesn’t want Kageyama to think he’s a weirdo or something just because they’re walking home together. They usually walk home together _anyway_. 

But Kageyama _waited_ for him.

That means he _wanted_ to walk with him. Maybe even _likes_ walking with him. Hinata quells his eagerness once more, jumps a few times so he’ll stop jittering and turns the corner, trying to pretend like he wasn’t just hiding to get his feelings under control.

“Why were you sitting around the corner?” Kageyama asks him and Hinata blanches. “People will think you’re creepy if you sit around watching them.”

_Kageyama_ calling _him_ creepy? Now he’s seen everything.

“I thought I saw a scorpion.” Hinata huffs a lie, not quite able to stare the setter in the face. He’s pretty sure they’re aren’t any scorpions in Japan but he hopes Kageyama doesn’t know that.

Kageyama shrugs the excuse off and motions for them to get going. They move in silence for a while, passing through the school gate, the park, the Sakinoshita store, and he wants to grab Kageyama's hand but he also doesn’t want to get hit. Hinata knows he should be making this time count but his throat feels like it’s so closed off, anything he says will come out a squeak. He fists the fabric of his jacket instead and bites his lip. This was so much easier when he didn’t know he had a crush on Kageyama, because now that he does, it’s all he thinks about. 

How Kageyama looks, the way his lips move when he talks, his gait as he walks, the shift of his shoulders when he sighs. The way sweat trails to his chin and drips off because of the way his jaw is shaped. _Oh, to kiss Kageyama’s jaw._ He shivers at the thought and starts when he notices he’s being stared at, scolding himself.

He clears his throat, “Kageyama?”

He receives a grunt in response.

“Do you like anyone? Like, you know, like-like,” he cringes at how childish he sounds.

Kageyama shrugs. “I don’t think it’d matter if I ever did,” and Hinata withers. 

“W-why not?”

“Well, volleyball always comes first. It’d be kind of stupid to date someone if I’d just rather practice when they’d rather go on dates and shit. I don’t really care about stuff like that.”

“Well, what if they didn’t mind you putting volleyball first? What if they wanted to play with you or something?” Hinata twists the ends of his jacket in his fingers. 

“Are you writing a book or something?” Kageyama grouches but his cheeks redden faintly and Hinata nearly wheezes.

“N-no!” He coughs, “I was just asking.”

“I guess that’d be different.” He turns to where they split up, crossing the street without a backwards glance and Hinata waits until he’s fully turned before he leaps onto his bike and pedals away, humming softly to himself. 

_There’s a chance. A chance that Kageyama could like me as much as I like him._

_

**Phase 3 - Gift Giving; Favors**

He determines he isn’t too good at thinking of gifts and resolves to use his babysitting money for milk and meat buns. 

“Here.” They’re waiting for morning practice when he hands him a bottle of Gun-Gun-Gurt.

“What?” Kageyama eyes the yogurt suspiciously. “I got it for you from the machine. Do you not want it?” Hinata deflates. He didn’t think he seemed weird when he asked but maybe he had. Nonetheless, the setter takes it and smells it, gaze flicking between Hinata and the yogurt as he takes a sip.

_

“Do you want to get meat buns after practice?” He asks as they’re cooling down after practice. “I’ll pay for them.”

Kageyama stops stretching and looks at him.

“Really?” and Hinata grins as he nods. 

This dissolves into a routine. They’ll stop on the way home and Hinata will buy for them both, if Daichi isn’t already buying for the team. Kageyama always thanks him gruffly before he takes an awkward first bite and it’s all Hinata can do not to crumble whenever Kageyama’s tongue pokes out of his mouth to lick a stray bit of meat on his lip, which happens quite often, actually.

This system works out for a while. 

Until it doesn’t.

“Do you want to go get food after this?”

“Are you paying?” Kageyama asks as he pulls his own arm across his body.

“Obviously.”

“Then yeah, let’s get food.”

“Hinata’s buying food?” Tanaka happens to be walking past and stops to peer over Kageyama’s shoulder, who nods.

“Guys! Hinata’s buying tonight!” And a multitude of cheers erupt from around the gym.

And later as they’re walking home, Hinata having significantly less money than he did when they left the school, and Kageyama munching on his own meat bun, he decides maybe he shouldn’t offer to buy things when they’re around the other guys anymore. Not that he minds buying for his team, even Tsukishima. But it makes him feel like what he’s doing for Kageyama is less special if he does it for everyone. And buying for all of them, is more money he could be using to treat the object of his affections. He feels himself go red and facepalms thinking of Kageyama like that. 

So he limits the buying things to milk at break times and the occasional stop at the coach's store and tries doing favors instead.

_

“Here,” he hands Kageyama’s water to him. He watches him carefully, studying the bottle but accepts it.

He tries it again the next day. “I grabbed it for you.” He offers. And Kageyama takes it from him with another strange look. 

And again. 

He makes it a habit to do it everyday. That is, until he gives Kageyama, Nishinoya’s water during practice. He gets a swift kick from the setter for his efforts. 

“Sorry, Noya-san,” Kageyama inclines his head stiffly, hand still locked tightly in Hinata’s hair, the middle blocker whining. “Shit-for-Brains made a mistake.”

“It was an accident! I was trying to be helpful!”

“I don’t mind! I’m sure he has nothing but the _purest_ intentions,” Nishinoya flashes Hinata, who blushes, mortified, a knowing smile and winks when Kageyama is turned away.

_

“I can carry your bag for you.”

“ _What?_ ” Kageyama looks at him weirdly. “Why would you do that?”

“Nothing,” Hinata flushes. “I don’t know.”

“You can if you want to,” Kageyama looks away from Hinata who grins irregardless, taking Kageyama’s bag off of him happily. He staggers briefly, before shifting the bag to where he can stand under its weight. “Dumbass.”

“Come on, Kageyama!” he bounces ahead, a grin stretched across his lips.

_

**Phase 4 - Physical Affection**

This is the one Hinata’s most worried about. He doesn’t want Kageyama to hit him if he does the wrong thing.

So he starts slow. Small nudges when he needs his attention, letting his fingers linger just a little bit when he hands Kageyama the milk he’s bought. Kageyama gets annoyed at first, snatching whatever he happens to be reaching for away, stiffening up when Hinata’s arms are in his space. 

They’re walking home when he makes another attempt.

“What are you doing, you psycho?” Hinata removes his hand from where it is on Kageyama’s arm, smiling sheepishly. 

“Just- um- checking something…” he says, patting the younger’s arm before removing his hand completely and tucking both into his pockets.

“You’re so fucking weird.”

“You’re so vulgar!”

Kageyama shoves at him and he staggers, catching himself on a lamppost before pushing back at the setter who’s hardly affected, lifting a hand to catch Hinata instead and steady him. Suddenly they’re pressed together, Kageyama’s bicep to his shoulder and his breath hitches aloud.

“What’s with you?” Kageyama turns to him but doesn’t move away and Shouyou positively _melts,_ moving the slightest bit closer and sighing.

“Nothing,” he says, and curses himself for wanting to rest his head on the stupid lughead’s shoulder.

_

“Why can’t I sleep in your bed?” Hinata pouts. They have this argument every time Hinata stays the night. He’ll sit on the edge of the bed and then stumble to his feet when Kageyama pushes him off and stand there with arms crossed, usually in a shirt a few sizes too big and Kageyama will try not to give in.

“Because it’s weird!”

“Not unless you make it weird!”

“You’re not sleeping with me!” He pushes Hinata’s face away.

“I-”

“ _No!_ ” 

“ _Whyyy?_ The floor is cold! Pleeeease Kageyamaaaa!” Hinata is on his knees next to Kageyama’s bed, looking up at him with big eyes. Kageyama avoids his gaze and Hinata pouts.

_Don’t look at his face Tobio, do not give in._

Hinata sighs.

He glances at him and grits his teeth. 

“ _Fine._ ”

“ _Plshah!_ ” Hinata jumps up and crawls into the space Kageyama makes for him and burrows under the blanket. Kageyama is warm and firm next to Hinata and it’s almost too much to bear.

“Your feet are cold, dumbass.”

“They wouldn’t be cold if you let me put them on you.” He puts the pads of his toes on Kageyama’s calf.

“Quit fucking touching me!”

“Stop cursing, Bakageyama, it’s ru- _ow!_ ”

“Do you want to lay here or not, stupid?” Kageyama sits up, glaring at him.

“Okay, okay.”

They settle back down, and if in the middle of the night, Kageyama wakes up with Hinata wrapped around him, his own arm slung over the middle blocker, he says nothing.lJust shifts back towards the wall and turns away. Hinata is just clingy in his sleep, that’s all this is.

_

“You’re doing alright, I guess... dumbass,” Kageyama says to Hinata as they stand before Nekoma during a practice game and Hinata positively beams. He’s been doing that a lot lately. He and Kageyama have been spending time together more and more and it makes him feel lighter, giddier. Everything feels happy.

In the end, they lose the first match, but Shouyou is still glowing from the praise and jittering in his shoes. He feels good. Like _really_ good. Lucky, almost. And maybe Kageyama feels it too. Maybe he hasn’t been imagining the glances and the way the setter leans into his touches now. 

It’s after another match that Kageyama wipes his face with his shirt and Hinata wants to kiss him so bad it hurts. 

“Kageyama!” He dashes across the court.

“Wha-” and then their lips are pressed together. 

The kiss is far from perfect. Their teeth bump through their skin with how hard Shouyou knocks their faces together and it’s kind of difficult to kiss someone so tall but Hinata sticks to him, arms thrown around his neck to steady himself on his tiptoes. Kageyama is sweaty and he kind of smells like B.O. but his lips are soft and his body is nice pressed to Hinata’s and it feels so good. 

He can hear the blood rushing in his ears, feel himself shake as he moves his lips. Kageyama is a bit slow on the uptake and it takes a few seconds before he’s moving too. Hinata sighs against him happily.

He registers Sugawara’s delighted laugh, and Tanaka and Nishinoya’s catcalls.

“Jesus _Christ_ ,” Tsukishima ‘tch’s disgustedly, and Asahi turns to look. 

“I didn’t know they were-”

“CUT IT OUT!” Daichi’s voice shatters the moment and then Kageyama is shoving Shouyou back, looking away staunchly. 

“Why did you-” and an arm is closing around his wrist and yanking him outside of the gym. Hinata wriggles away and backs up to the wall.

“What the hell was that dumbass?!” Suddenly Kageyama looks mad- no _furious_ , crowding him against the wall of the gym and instead of the usual fear, Hinata feels shame building. This isn’t how this is supposed to go. This isn’t what he planned for. Kageyama is supposed to kiss back and hold his hand, not shove him away and throw him. 

“Why would you do something like that? What the fuck is wrong with you?” 

“But- you kissed me back,” he whimpers. “You liked it.”

_I know you did._

“Guys, Daichi isn’t ha- Kageyama, lay off him!” Sugawara peeks his head out of the gym. His eyes widen and then he’s running over, presumably to save Hinata’s life. A hand is between them and Kageyama’s pushed a few feet back. Hinata’s embarrassed and confused but he bites his lip and looks down to blink away his tears. 

“Are you okay, Hinata? What’s wrong?” Sugawara speaks soothingly as he runs a hand up and down Hinata’s arm. Hinata, trying to maintain some semblance of self and not fall apart quite yet, shakes his head. 

“Nothing, Suga-san. Just wasn’t thinking.”

  
  


“‘Not thinking’,” Kageyama mocks. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you _kidding_ ? How _annoying_ ,” Kageyama is glaring at Hinata and when he moves to swing on him again, is when the redhead bursts into tears. 

“There’s nothing wrong with me! You’re just stupid, Bakageyama! You’re so stupid and blind and dumb and I hate you! I wish I couldn’t stand you!” He can’t hear himself but he’s screaming. He knows he’s screaming because his throat is stinging and his eyes are puffy with tears and he’s moving toward Kageyama, who’s standing frozen, dazed, and shoving him and hitting him and now Sugawara’s arms are pulling him back and he’s screaming harder, and Kenma and his team are watching from the doorway and he’s so ashamed but he can’t _stop_ because everything is ruined and Kageyama will never ever love him now.

“Let me go! Stop touching me!”

Kageyama looks away from him.

“Hinata calm-”

“Let go of me! Kageyama, you spoiled everything! I tried so hard,” he stops struggling, sagging in Sugawara’s arms. “I tried so hard. I thought- it still ended up like this. It doesn’t even matter,” and his neck is wet with sweat and tears and his whole body is hot and he just wants to leave because everything is _broken_ , and Kageyama called him his friend and now he can’t bear to look at him. “I’m sorry, Suga-san. But I’m going home now.” 

He nearly trips, moving to stand on his own, but catches himself before he can be embarrassed further and grabs his shoes before he makes his way to the club room. His body feels heavy and he’s really tired all of the sudden and he knows biking home will be exhausting but he’ll feel guilty if he calls his mom to ask for a ride and it’s not until he’s wheeling his bike out of the school gate that he finally feels the loss and allows himself to cry.

Kageyama could never want him now. 

Shouyou _aches._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A realization and a reunion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone that took the time to read this! I was super nervous to post this but you were all really kind so I thought I should finish it up.

Shouyou isn't crying by the time he gets home, but he does ignore his name being called from the kitchen. He answers with an apology, and climbs the stairs tiredly. 

He bursts into fresh tears upon entering his room and seeing his reflection. He hates this. 

He looks at the light on his desk, blinks back the moisture in his eyes. He wants to think about something, anything else. Wants to stop feeling so stupid.

His phone chimes. A message from Suga-san. There are a few from Kenma. A tiny bit of him wants one to be from Kageyama. He digs his palms into his nails in self-loathing. Had he not been so adamant that Kageyama returned his feelings, he might not have lost a friend. Or embarrassed himself so badly. Another tear slips down his face and he thinks about his team _and_ Kenma’s seeing him get rejected. Tsukishima and Lev getting to see him cry over stupid dumb Kageyama. Not to mention the weird looks he’ll probably get from the coach from now on. 

He begs his mom to let him stay home. He begs until he’s reduced to tears again and he nearly throws up. But come Monday, his mom is leaving the house with Natsu and he’s left to cry alone once more.

He texts Sugawara and Kenma both to let them know that he’s okay and then he puts his phone away. 

He begs for another day home. Cries on his knees until Natsu starts too and his mom caves (“but this is it, Shouyou. You’re not missing anymore school.”)

He watches them leave the next morning. His mom tells him they’ll be home late that evening as his sister waves. He turns away from the window and crawls back under his covers. Everything still hurts but it’ll do no good to just stay home and hide. He misses playing volleyball. He misses Kageyama even though he _knows_ Kageyama doesn’t want him. The thought still stings more than it should. A few tears leak from his eyes, and he brushes them away with the back of his hand. He’ll go back tomorrow, not that he has a choice. He curls himself under the covers and resigns himself to going back to sleep because there’s nothing else to do about it.

_

When Hinata doesn’t show up to school, at first Kageyama is relieved. In truth he’s still kind of pissed about the whole situation and he doubts that he’d be able to keep himself from yelling at him again. He goes to morning practice and pretends he doesn’t see Sugawara and Asahi, and even Yamaguchi looking at him pityingly. He’s not the one they should feel sorry for. Hinata was the one that left crying. Kageyama had _made_ him cry, and had gotten a sick sense of pleasure from doing it. It’d served the dumbass right for kissing him even though he had a crush on Akaashi.

But by the second day, the guilt is starting to eat at him. He tries to go about his day. He eats lunch outside in their usual spot. It’s a little quiet compared to what he’s used to and he wills himself to ignore it. He hadn’t realized how much Hinata had ingrained himself into Kageyama. It’s kind of lonely without him, and he tries to ignore that too. 

Afternoon practice is another few hours of his teammates and even the managers throwing him cautious glances when they think he’s not looking. It isn’t until he sees Tsukishima staring at him blatantly as he’s leaving practice that he snaps. 

“ _What is your deal?_ ” He rounds on him and Tsukishima rolls his eyes as though it’s obvious. 

“I don’t have one. You do.” 

Kageyama scoffs, “The only problem I have is you staring, jerkhole. There’s nothing wrong with me.”

“Look, I could care less about you and the runt, but Yamaguchi’s been upset about it all day, and _that_ I’m not okay with. So whatever you did, fix it.”

“I didn’t _do_ anything-” Kageyama starts.

“He hasn’t been to school in two days and you think that you didn’t do anything? God, you’re more daft than I thought. You come to practice brooding like an idiot after you made him cry and you still think everything is fine?”

“I- I don’t have to explain anything to you! And it serves him right for ki- for doing something like that in front of everyone when he has a crush on someone else.”

Tsukishima grits his teeth. “You’re such an idiot. He likes _you_. And it’s obvious to everyone but you’re such a fucking moron that you’re the only one that hasn’t realized.”

“I- He- He what?”

“Look, I know it’s hard for you but use that empty skull and think. Buying you stuff? Trying to be close to you? It’s almost disgusting, really.”

“He likes me.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying to you, yes.”

“Hinata likes me.” Kageyama can hear the blood rushing in his ears. He feels lighter somehow, like something’s been lifted off of him. He wants to laugh so badly but he refuses to do so in front of Tsukishima. 

“Oh my God, I’m done being nice to you.” He walks away leaving Kageyama standing there, stunned.

_It was me. The whole time it was me. And I- Fuck! I_ hurt _him._

_

Hinata is downstairs in the kitchen when there’s a knock at the door. He shovels another bite of rice into his mouth and stands up from the table. There’s another knock, more urgent this time. He hitches his pajama pants higher onto his hips and moves faster as the knocking dissolves into consistent pounding. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming, calm d-” the door swings open and there, sweating and huffing as though he’s run a marathon, stands Kageyama. 

Kageyama. 

Shouyou’s skin breaks into a cold sweat and he tries to slam the door. A foot jams its way in, then a leg, and then Kageyama is forcing his way inside.

“Get out of my house! You can’t just-” 

“I need to talk to you!” Kageyama blurts. “I-”

“I don’t want to talk to you, Bakageyama!” He’s shoving at his chest trying to push him back through the door, socks sliding against the wood floor. He nearly falls when his feet slip, but Kageyama’s large hands grip his arms to steady him.

“It’s important. Please.” He says and Shouyou forces himself to look away. 

“Fine.”

“You like me.”

“That’s not fair, Kageyama! You-”

“Let me finish, dumbass.” The older boy falls silent and casts his eyes down. “You like me, and I didn’t realize. I heard you talking with Kozume at camp. I didn’t- So when you kissed-” Shouyou flinches and Kageyama’s chest stings. “When you kissed me, I thought you were just fucking with me and you had feelings for Akaashi-san.”

Hinata’s head snaps up and he flicks Kageyama on the forehead. 

“You really are stupid! Why would I carry your stuff and sit by you and snuggle you- _I literally snuggle you, Kageyama-_ How did you come up with a dumb idea like that?”

“I know, I know,” Kageyama groans. “Tsukishima already bitched at me. But I needed you to know that, and-” he breaks off and Shouyou can see the vein in his jaw twitch as he clenches it. “And, I’m sorry, okay? I- I _do_ want to be with you.” Kageyama is watching him like he’s searching for something, trying to read him. 

“Okay.” 

“Okay?” Kageyama’s eyebrows raise and he gets a relieved sort of look on his face. 

“But,” he points at him. “You have to call me Shouyou. That’s what boyfriends do.”

“I- Okay.”

“Okay?” It’s Hinata’s turn to ask.

“Yeah. Okay. You can call me Tobio, I guess.”

Something blooms in Hinata’s chest at the thought of calling Kageyama by his first name, of being Kageyama’s _boyfriend._ He notes Kageyama’s hands still on his shoulders. He wants to kiss him again. To soothe the permanent pout off of his lips. But he doesn’t want to push, not when they just got together and everything is brand new still. 

“Hin- Shouyou,” Kageyama looks at him, licks his lips before he asks tentatively, “Can I kiss you?” 

“Yeah,” he nods and then he’s being dragged forward onto his toes and closing his eyes as their lips meet and it’s _so_ much better than the first time. Sure, Kageyama’s lips are chapped and they’re both inexperienced but Kageyama _wants_ him and now they’re _together_.

He moves his lips carefully, trying to match the pace that Kageyama’s set. His hands move up to Kageyama’s shoulders as the setter’s move to his waist, and then they’re pressed flush together and this is everything he’s dreamed about for months. He parts his lips slightly, licking the teeniest bit as he focuses on the taller boy’s bottom lip. Kageyama opens up and fits their open mouths together, pulling Shouyou impossibly closer as he tastes him. 

“Ka- Kageyama, haa,” he pants into him, clutching the front of his jacket, and the hands on his waist clench. He breaks away to gasp. 

“You- you’re hard!”

“Shut up, dumbass! This is my first time doing this!” He looks away from Shouyou as his face tints a deep red. 

“It’s my first time too! This is only my second kiss.” Hinata pouts. He pushes his stomach against the hardness in Kageyama’s pants and grins when the Kageyama bucks into him.

“Stop it, asshole. It won’t go away if you do that.” Kageyama shoves him back. 

“I- I want to see!” Shouyou practically shouts and he can feel his face get hot as the other boy’s mouth falls open. “Nevermind, forget I sai-”

“Okay.”

“You- what?”

“Okay.” And Hinata leaps at him, mouth moving furiously, attacking his face, neck, chest. Kageyama cups his cheek and pulls his face back to his own and kisses him feverishly. 

“Where’s- your room?” 

“Upstairs.”

“Shoes, Bakageyama!”

“Right, my bad.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading! (I don't know if people actually read the end notes but I figured I'd put some anyway). I'm sorry this chapter is so short, I'm not really happy with how it turned out because everything felt kind of rushed but it's been so long since I posted the first chapter that I wanted to put at least something up. I'm hoping to start a new story or maybe take requests once I find an upload schedule that works for me, so if any of you would be interested in that, please let me know! 
> 
> Also! My Tumblr is chunky-but--funky! Come find me and we can cri abt hq together bc I cri abt hq a lotttttt.


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